my brain reminds my heart
if my hands try to reach for your fingertips again, it's not possible at all
I can't call someone back into my life
who doesn't want to come back either.
But as people say,
even after someone's completely gone
there are still signs of their existence
and it's true-
I've been having mirages about you
I've stalked my next-door neighbor
and gotten myself humiliated, all because,
for a moment their hair looked exactly like yours
their silhouette resembled your figure
the way they walked reminded me of yours
and how you could never jump over a puddle.
I don't remember you everyday
or crave your voice like before
because it's almost been five years
and to be honest, with time, memories fade away
the deep, sharp feeling cutting through your soul goes away
I can't remember feeling what i felt back then
maybe some parts of me have healed
but i haven't forgotten you entirely.
When a random stranger slides into my dm
and sends me the exact reel you once sent
at that moment, you come into my mind
there are signs of your existence
things that remind me of you from time to time
but I've made peace with it
'cos missing you doesn't feel that awful now;
afterall, you were the most beautiful part of my story
and there are no regrets
no better storyline or plot twist
and maybe i wouldn't be where i am today
if we never crossed paths...
so thank you - thank you to the stranger we both have become now
i haven't fallen in love again since then,
but someday, i wish to meet you again
not as a lover lost but as a friend gained.
~Sailaxmi
Explanation
Overall Theme
The poem explores the long, complicated journey of healing after losing someone deeply cherished. It reflects how time softens pain, turning sharp heartbreak into a gentle kind of missing that no longer hurts. Even after years, memories surface through small triggers, proving that love leaves traces even after it ends. Instead of regret, the poem embraces gratitude, accepting that some people shape us forever. Ultimately, it’s about emotional growth, acceptance, and finding peace with a past that once defined us.
Stanza-by-Stanza Explanation
Stanza 1
“You're gone, and someday I'll be gone too
my brain reminds my heart
if my hands try to reach for your fingertips again, it's not possible at all
I can't call someone back into my life
who doesn't want to come back either.”
This stanza reveals the internal struggle between longing and reality. The heart still reaches toward the past, but the mind keeps reminding that the person is truly gone. Love cannot exist alone; if someone chooses to stay away, you cannot pull them back. It expresses acceptance of emotional finality and the painful understanding that closure sometimes comes without reconciliation.
Stanza 2
“But as people say,
even after someone's completely gone
there are still signs of their existence
and it's true,
I've been having mirages about you
I've stalked my next-door neighbor
and gotten myself humiliated, all because,
for a moment their hair looked exactly like yours
their silhouette resembled your figure
the way they walked reminded me of yours
and how you could never jump over a puddle.”
This stanza shows how grief distorts perception. Even long after someone leaves, their presence lingers through memories and accidental resemblances. Small details, a hairstyle, a walk, a habit, become emotional triggers. The mind plays tricks, momentarily confusing strangers with someone familiar. It captures longing, the yearning for familiarity, and the humiliating yet human ways we chase the shadows of someone we once loved deeply.
Stanza 3
“I don't remember you everyday
or crave your voice like before
because it's almost been five years
and to be honest, with time, memories fade away
the deep, sharp feeling cutting through your soul goes away
I can't remember feeling what I felt back then
maybe some parts of me have healed
but I haven't forgotten you entirely.”
This stanza acknowledges time’s natural healing power. The burning intensity that once consumed the writer has softened. Pain loses its sharpness, and memories become blurred, not erased. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting; it means the emotions no longer overwhelm. The writer recognizes that they’ve grown, matured, and moved forward, yet the person still occupies a quiet place in their memory.
Stanza 4
“When a random stranger slides into my dm
and sends me the exact reel you once sent
at that moment, you come into my mind
there are signs of your existence
things that remind me of you from time to time
but I've made peace with it
'cos missing you doesn't feel that awful now;”
This stanza reflects how healing coexists with unexpected reminders. A simple coincidence, a reel once shared, momentarily brings the person back into the writer’s thoughts. But unlike before, these reminders don’t cause pain. Instead, they bring a soft, almost nostalgic warmth. The writer has reached emotional acceptance, where missing someone doesn’t reopen wounds but gently acknowledges the past.
Stanza 5
“afterall, you were the most beautiful part of my story
and there are no regrets
no better storyline or plot twist
and maybe i wouldn't be where i am today
if we never crossed paths...”
This stanza shows pure gratitude. Instead of bitterness, the writer cherishes the relationship as an important chapter that contributed to personal growth. There’s no desire to rewrite the story or undo what happened. The experience, though painful, shaped the writer’s identity and journey. It marks emotional maturity, honoring the past without wanting it back.
Stanza 6
“so thank you, thank you to the stranger we both have become now
i haven't fallen in love again since then,
but someday, i wish to meet you again
not as a lover lost but as a friend gained.”
This final stanza accepts change, growth, and emotional distance. The two people are now strangers shaped by time, yet the writer feels gratitude rather than sadness. Not having loved again shows vulnerability, not weakness. The hope of meeting in the future as friends symbolizes full healing, wanting peace, not rekindling. It closes the poem with maturity, humility, and quiet hope.
