Poem:
Sisters are not the backbone supporters of each other. Sometimes they're just another way you can dump all your traumas. The loud voices and anger which could never make their way out. And no matter how much they seem close, they too hide the scars they caused each other, even those which are clearly visible.
I don't remember being so perfect, so nice to her
And I don't remember her being the same to me
But we're still sisters and we still love each other
With all the sharp words we have used
And the abuses we chose, out of the three languages we knew.
~Sailaxmi
Explanation
Overall Theme
The poem explores the complicated, imperfect bond between sisters, where love and hurt coexist in equal measure. It shows how siblings become both victims and healers of each other’s emotional wounds. Despite anger, harsh words, hidden scars, and unresolved trauma, the relationship survives because of an unspoken, enduring love that continues beneath all the conflict and pain.
Stanza 1
“Sisters are not the backbone supporters of each other.
Sometimes they're just another way you can dump all your traumas.
The loud voices and anger which could never make their way out.
And no matter how much they seem close, they too hide the scars they caused each other, even those which are clearly visible.”
This stanza reveals the raw truth that sisterhood isn’t always gentle or supportive. Sisters sometimes become the closest targets for buried trauma and anger, simply because they are near and familiar. Even when they appear united, they silently carry wounds they inflicted on one another—some hidden, some painfully obvious. The poem highlights how closeness can create emotional collision, leaving scars that never fully fade but remain part of the relationship.
Stanza 2
“I don't remember being so perfect, so nice to her
And I don't remember her being the same to me
But we're still sisters and we still love each other
With all the sharp words we have used
And the abuses we chose, out of the three languages we knew.”
The second stanza accepts mutual imperfection. Neither sister was gentle, yet the bond survives through honesty rather than idealization. Their love is not soft or flawless, it is shaped by arguments, harsh words, and multilingual insults. Still, the emotional connection remains strong. The poem suggests that true sisterhood isn’t about perfection but about enduring loyalty, the ability to love through conflicts, and remembering that behind every fight lies a shared history.
Why do sisters hurt each other even when they love each other?
Sisters hurt each other often because intense closeness magnifies differences and unmet expectations. Familiarity permits blunt honesty that can become painful. Childhood wounds, comparison, and communication gaps resurface during conflict. Hurtful words sometimes aim to be heard. Love remains beneath the pain, needing understanding and patient repair and compassionate listening.
Can sibling fights damage a lifelong relationship?
Repeated hurtful behaviour can gradually erode trust and create lasting wounds if left unaddressed. Yet many sibling relationships recover through sincere apologies, consistent boundaries, and empathy. Repair demands ongoing effort: honest conversations, mutual accountability, and rebuilt reliability. With commitment and humility, decades-long bonds often survive and sometimes deepen over time.
How do you start healing after a painful argument with a sister?
Begin by stepping back to cool down and observe your feelings without blaming. Offer a calm, specific apology when ready and invite open exchange. Listen fully, validate hurt, and agree on concrete steps to prevent repeats. Therapy or family mediation can provide tools and a safe structure for gradual healing.
Is it normal for sisters to hide their true feelings from each other?
Yes. People hide emotions to avoid vulnerability, protect themselves, or keep the peace. Shame, fear of rejection, and habit encourage concealment, even between sisters. While secrecy may feel safer short-term, it prevents intimacy and repair. Sharing vulnerabilities, timed and framed safely, builds empathy and allows wounds to be acknowledged and treated openly.
How can siblings maintain love despite recurring conflicts?
Maintaining love requires clear boundaries, small rituals of care, and practiced forgiveness. Prioritise respectful communication, notice each other’s efforts, and avoid rehashing every old hurt. Accept differences instead of trying to control them, and seek mediation when patterns persist. Mutual curiosity, gratitude, and steady kindness help love endure over time.
